Closer and Closer

As I write this, I'm in the midst of nervousness/excitement/overall anticipation. The race is now only 15 days away and I am getting into the real grind of not being able to train as I'm used to. I have been sending constant emails to my teammates/mentors about any advice I may have missed. Additionally, I've finalized my nutrition plan for the race and I am confident that I can eat and drink as much as I plan to. Apart from all the due diligence I believe I have done, I'm still nervous. It has been harder and harder to get a good night's rest. All I keep thinking about is the finish line, seeing Kush, Muff, Mike, feeling Jared with me, and thanking God that I was given that opportunity. Furthermore, I joined iAmTri.com and I am one of their featured members. Because of that, I've received many comments/messages wishing me good luck, from complete strangers! Here is an excerpt I received from someone two days ago:

"Ironman athletes often dedicate races to those they care about. My first Ironman was dedicated to my mentor who, like your friend, had passed away while I was training for it. I had his name on my hat.

Keep in mind that the act of just dedicating this endeavor to your friend's memory is success alone and with that, you can't fail. You may not cross the finish line because only God controls that outcome. Your dedication and offering of doing your best is all that you can do. Leave the rest up to God.

I have no doubt that you'll cross the finish line. Your friend will be with you all the way......so will I.

May the Lord be with you,
Michael"

Sounds very religious I know, but that's been something that's been in the back of my mind. I haven't forgotten that there is someone up there who's watching over me and will be my guide throughout the 140.6 miles, at least that's what I believe.

This whole journey has been all consuming. It wasn't quite this way at the beginning of the season, but now that this race is so damn close, I am beyond focused. These are life changing moments, and if and when I cross that finish line, I will be a changed person.....forever. The sacrifices that I have made to come this far are even unbelievable to myself. Again, I go back to my support and the strength that my friends have lent me throughout the past year. Never once did someone say "I don't think you can do that" It has always been "how's training? How are you feeling? Where can I get a hotel in Louisville?"

Apart from Ironman, and whether I finish or not, I know that I have accomplished so much in my life. I have been through the best of times and the worst of times. This race will magnify those good times and trivialize those hard times. Knowing what I have been through in my life, this is just a transition of drive into something completely tangible, something that will remain with me and my friends forever. So in essence, this race is more than a race to me.....it has become my life. I have felt myself change during this past year, into a person that I never thought I'd become. I can't really explain that, it's too tough. There is just something different about taking on 140.6 miles and the willingness to offer the utmost respect to that distance, because in all reality, this distance has killed people before.....but it's also made dreams come true. It's not about the race as much as its about the sacrifice, the pain, the drive.....and hopefully the reward. I will try to post another blog entry before I leave for Louisville, but if you don't check back, please say a prayer for me and/or keep me in your thoughts on the 31st. I would really appreciate that. Thanks again.

15. (I remember when this number was 365 like it was yesterday)